In the pursuit of remembering


For those eagle-eyed amongst you, you might have noticed I look somewhat different up there ↑ (in all fairness you don't have to be Sherlock to spot it!). The rather lovely Sophie Carefull took some great photos of me a few weeks ago, and I am gradually introducing them into all my online homes. What do you think?

It's been an interesting week, and by "interesting", I mean kind of tough and a bit transformational. My week starts on a Sunday (old hospitality industry habits die hard), and last weekend was a bit heavy - for those of you that saw my Instagram story last Sunday, you will know that's why there wasn't an "I Belong" last weekend.

I'm OK don't worry, but I think working and living alone for the last five months had accumulated over time and left me feeling quite alone and a pretty lonely - and it felt quite acute last Sunday.  I don't tell you this story for sympathy at all, I'm just wondering if I am actually alone in feeling like this.

I live by myself and if I don't kick my own arse, I can spend all day in the house by myself, just talking to clients on Skype on my coaching days; but I don't think me living alone is the sum of the problem. The more I have reflected on this since last weekend and talked to folks on Instagram and actual breathing humans in person, the more I can feel just how lonely a lot of us are these days. No matter whether we live in a house full of partners and kids with not a minute to ourselves, or whether we live alone, increasingly I think we feel isolated and disconnected by our "separateness". I have a growing suspicion this could be one of our greatest threats in society today. I'd love to know your experience.

The transformational bit came chatting to a coaching colleague about things we love to do. I sacrificed so much for "that job" in 2017/early 2018, that almost everything that I love to do had gone by the wayside, and most hasn't been picked up again.  I have a huge love of live music gigs but haven't been to one in ages; used to lift weights for fun (yep I am the owner of a t-shirt that says "lifting heavy shit") but I'm now a member of a pretentious as-F gym where there is no community to speak of and I wouldn't feel at all comfortable embarking on power lifting. And the list goes on.

So this weeks transformation comes in the form of remembering.  Remembering what I love to do, reconnecting with what it means to be me, and finding little things I can do that both bring me joy and connect me with other humans that "get it".

Is there anything in your life that has gradually eroded away so subtly that you haven't even noticed? What little change can you make to step a little closer to it?

Have you signed up for my FREE three-week course YOUR values | YOUR life yet? Your Core Personal Values are one of the bricks in the first pillar of Four Pillars of Belonging to Yourself "KNOW Yourself"; when we live, love and work in a way that honours our values, we feel safe and fulfilled. Are you living, loving and leading aligned to your Core Personal Values? Click on the image to find out more.